I'm reading Big Mo's new book, "The Second Half" at the moment and came across this little gem:
St Helens were due to play their fierce rivals Wigan in a local derby but were going through a terrible injury crisis and had to draft a young winger in to mark Billy Boston. Come the day of the derby and a massive crowd thronged Central Park with the youngster a bundle of nerves in the changerooms. He nervously asked his coach what should he do if Billy tried to take him on the outside?
"No bother, son", came the confident reply, "with your speed just let him get level and push him into touch". The youngster chewed on the advise for a moment and enquired what to do if Billy cut inside? Again the advise sounded good that he should simply tackle him from behind using his blinding speed.
"But what if Billy decided to run straight at me?" asked the , by now, ashen faced speedster. "WELL,that's easy" came the response from his coach, "just throw some sh*te in his face--that'll stop him dead"!!!
"WHAT"? Said the young winger. "Where am I gonna find sh*te on a rugby field"?
The now fed up coach looked him straight in the eye and uttered "Son, if Billy Boston is running straight at you----" You can guess the rest!
Still love the one concerning the same Maurice Bamford when he took over the coaching reins at Derwent Park some years ago when Town were, as now, going through a rough patch and Big Mo was deemed to be the saviour of this once proud club. Came the first training session and Mo had left instructions that he wanted his troops to assemble in the changing rooms before training started--he had some words of wisdom to impart on his new team!
The Town players all gathered round awaiting the entrance of the new Messiah. In walked Mo with that stern look on his face that would turn cheese mouldy. "Lads", he said, "how many of you want to go to Wembley"? asked the ever optimistic Mo. There was some silence interspersed with some nervous rustling of bums on seats and more than one giggle fit. "WELL"? asked Mo.
Absolutely nothing for a long 30 seconds then the silence was broken by the club captain with "Why, are you running a bus, Mo"?
Well I thought it funny anyhow.
El Tel.
