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little bit of humour

Offline puppetmaster

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on: 27 Mar 2007, 10:59:54 pm

Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, a workington town fan and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it?

A: The old drunk, of course - the other 3 are mythical creatures
the reverand, big mac

Just cause you don't understand what's going on don't mean it don't make no sense
And just cause you don't like it, don't mean it ain't no good


Offline puppetmaster

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Reply #1 on: 27 Mar 2007, 11:01:13 pm
Newsflash:

Thieves broke into the home of Worzel and stole two books.

"The thing that really upsets me", he said "is that I hadn't finished colouring them in yet!"

the reverand, big mac

Just cause you don't understand what's going on don't mean it don't make no sense
And just cause you don't like it, don't mean it ain't no good


Monte2carlo

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Reply #2 on: 27 Mar 2007, 11:07:25 pm
Colouring books, nah it was paper and crayons with scribbling on about attack and defend

Roll on Leeds,  is it on radio cumbria i will denfinetly be listening to that game if its on

Monte

 


Offline puppetmaster

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Reply #3 on: 27 Mar 2007, 11:18:15 pm
You're trapped in a room with a Grizzly Bear, a deadly Rattlesnake, and a Townie. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the Townie.
 Twice.

A wee fella hands over a ?50 note to the turnstyle operator at Derwent Park
Fella: Two please.
Turnstyle Operator: Will that be Forwards or Backs, sir?

 Q: If you see a Townie on a bike, why should you never swerve to hit him?
It might be your bike...

Q: Why do Townies have Moustaches?
A: So they can look like their Mothers.

Q. Two Townies jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground first?.
A. Who cares!

Q: What do you get when you cross a Town fan with a pig?
A: I don't know, there are some things a pig just won't do.
 :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D ; :D :D ;D ;D
the reverand, big mac

Just cause you don't understand what's going on don't mean it don't make no sense
And just cause you don't like it, don't mean it ain't no good


Monte2carlo

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Reply #4 on: 27 Mar 2007, 11:22:02 pm
Big fella,

You have just be invited to the Kenny shepherd club i'll nominate you to champ.

What do you call a jambo in a suit
The accused

What do you call a jambo in a bmw
A car thief

Monte


haven1985

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Reply #5 on: 28 Mar 2007, 09:06:59 am
Q. Two townies jump off a cliff, who wins?
A. Society.
 
Q. What does a townie girl use as protection during sex?
A. Bus shelter.
 
Q. What do you call a 30 year old townie girl?
A. Granny.
 
Q. What do you call a townie in a box?
A. Innit.
 
Q. What do you call a townie in a filing cabinet?
A. Sorted.
 
Q. What do you say to a townie in a suit?
A. "Will the defendant please rise"
 
Q. Why did the townie cross the road?
A. To start a fight with a complete stranger for no reason what so ever.
 
Q. What do you call a townie girl in a white tracksuit?
A. The bride.
 
Q. If you're driving and see a townie on a bike why should you try not to hit him?
A. It might be your bike.


haven1985

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Reply #6 on: 28 Mar 2007, 09:08:57 am
Q. What's the first question during a townie quiz night?
A. What you looking at.
 
Q. Why are townies like slinkey's?
A. They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of stairs
 
Q. Two townies in a car without any music, who's driving?
A. The polliceman!
 
Q. How do you get a hundred townies in a phonebox?
A. Paint 3 stripes on it.
 
Q. What do you call a hundred townies at the bottom of the river?
A. A start.
 
Q. Where do you take a townie girl for a decent night out?
A. Up the ar * e.
 
Q. Why is 3 townies going over a cliff in a nova a shame?
A. Because a nova has 4 seats.
 
Q. What do you call a townie with 9 gcse's?
A. A liar.
 
Q. What do you say to a townie with a job?
A. Bigmac please.


Offline haven hora

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Reply #7 on: 04 Apr 2007, 03:58:42 pm
HaHa bewtys there gavin


Offline Bkenz92

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Reply #8 on: 04 Apr 2007, 09:01:05 pm
Who's the best looking lass in Workington ?

A tourist


Monte2carlo

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Reply #9 on: 04 Apr 2007, 09:24:13 pm
What do you call a jameater in a detached house

A burgular

Monte